Chances are, you’ve been spending a lot of time around your home and neighborhood recently. Working from your living room; working out in your bedroom; walking around the neighborhood for relaxation; ordering carry-out from local restaurants nearby… For most of us, this spring has been an exercise in figuring out how to confine our lives to a much smaller geographic area than ever before.
At the same time, most of us are longing for “the old days” of exploring our beloved Disney Parks and the original places, stories, characters, snacks, and souvenirs that bring them to life. And that got us to thinking… If you were given free reign of Disney Parks and offered one land to fully, immersively inhabit to ride out the remainder of any “quarantine” or self-isolation Castaway style, which would you choose to make your home? We’re talking, total reliance on its in-universe availability and story – where would you live? What would you eat? Where would you get your exercise?
Here are our top picks, but be sure to share your ideas in the comments below!
1. Adventureland at the Magic Kingdom
Adventureland might just be the perfect place to self-isolate. After all, the Robinson family already did it! In what other Disney Parks land will you find a fully-functional, plumbing-equipped, bed-ready Swiss Family Robinson Treehouse? With running water, records, books, and games, this Magic Kingdom retreat could literally be a home away from home if you were looking for a long-term place to isolate.
Wouldn’t it be nice to do your daily walk “around the neighborhood” along the banks of the Jungle Cruise, replacing squirrel sightings and tweeting birds with apes and anacondas?
And in terms of those “neighborhood restaurants,” just think about it – not only would Adventureland give you access to Citrus Swirls and Dole Whips, but also the magnificently unique cuisine of the Jungle River Navigation Co. Skipper Canteen!
If we imagine that this quarantine would also magically give you access to the rides and attractions in the land (which is a much more fun idea), you’d also get unlimited solo boat rides on Pirates of the Caribbean, the chance to perfect your family’s own skipper spiels on the Jungle Cruise, and of course, plentiful hours “singing like the birdies sing” in the Modern Marvel: The Enchanted Tiki Room. What more could you ask for?
2. The Land at Epcot
For foodies and gardeners alike, there can be no better place to self-isolate than The Land pavilion at Epcot. I mean, you could truly and literally play out your dreams of “living off The Land!” First of all, imagine waking up each morning to unmoor a boat from its dock at Living with the Land and riding it off to the greenhouses to do your daily cultivating and farming, and using the gourmet kitchens of the Garden Grill Restaurant to whip up something fresh.
Plus, if you snoop around enough (which we think you’d be justified in doing in this rare circumstance), the hidden Kraft lounge not only provides sensational views of the dessert and farmhouse scenes of Living With the Land, but its most recent use – an AP lounge in 2000 – makes us think it’s the perfect outfit for sneaking away for some quiet time away from the family.
Also consider that being “stuck” in the land would offer you unfettered access to one of the hottest Walt Disney World E-Tickets there is – the Modern Marvel: Soarin‘ – not to mention the theater currently showing “Awesome Planet” which, at least in this daydream, could be reconfigured into your private home theater to show Disney+ all day, every day.
3. Pandora: The World of AVATAR at Disney’s Animal Kingdom
Right now, plenty of folks staying home are secretly (or not-so-secretly) wishing that they’d been stuck in a tropical paradise just before this hit, forcing them to “lock down” at an island resort. At Disney World, Pandora is about as close to that as you can get! It wouldn’t be so bad to be “stranded” on the distant moon of Pandora lightyears from Earth right now, living amongst the incredible flora and fauna of the Valley of Mo’ara – a place invented entirely by Disney Imagineers.
Not only could you enjoy the spectacular foods and curious drinks of the Satuli Canteen and Pongu Pongu – celebrating the indigenous flavors and ingredients of the native Na’vi people – but you could also hike through miles of trails cutting through the bioluminscent jungles and the abandoned remains of human encampments from a long-passed era. Plus, if you get lonely, you can adopt a Banshee who’ll stick by your side (literally) as you tackle one of the best Disney “mountain” rides ever and get unlimited tours of the jungle aboard Na’vi River Journey. (You could ride so many times, you’d be singing along in Na’vi!)
Where would you sleep? Well, while we might never get a glimpse of any actual resort-style facilities set up on Pandora (apparently it’s more of a day-visit than a multi-day resort), no doubt thousands and thousands of guests submitted their names to a “glamp” (that’s glamour-camp) on the moon overnight to enjoy its bioluminescent nightlight. Chances are that you could set up a rudimentary tent of your own, sleeping amid the babbling brooks and roaring waterfalls of this supernatural spectacle.
4. New Orleans Square at Disneyland
If you ask many Disney Imagineering afficianados, New Orleans Square might just be the peak of classic Disney; one of the most cherished and beloved lands of Walt’s era. That’s why it made our list of 16 Disneyland Exclusives That Should Make Disney World Fans Jealous. (Don’t worry – we offer the opposite list, too.) Its magnificently-detailed streets of the Jazz Age are beautiful and enchanting, inviting exploration.
Food wise, New Orleans Square has a few of our favorites. If you don’t mind putting on “the quarantine fifteen” (and let’s face it – at this point, who cares?), imagine hot and fresh Mickey-shaped beignets every day, in shakable bags filled with powdered-sugar. You’ve also got the sensational French Market with its corn chowder, jambalya, and roasted chicken ready for patio dining (though we suspect the in-house jazz band would be absent in this situation).
From ground level, guests can glimpse apartments and rooms overhead in the second story with balconies overlooking acres of Spanish moss, magnolia beds, fountains, and of course, the Rivers of America beyond. Running around or yoga by the waterfront? Count us in.
Adventure-wise, self-isolating in New Orleans Square would give you access to two of the greatest Disney attractions ever designed: Pirates of the Caribbean and the Haunted Mansion. Just think, you could ride these two starring E-Tickets so many times, you’d be an expert on both… if you’re not already! You could also imagine the pièce de résistance: dinner nightly in the Blue Bayou – the restaurant located inside Pirates of the Caribbean, beneath eternal night skies.
Or would you use your lockdown in New Orleans Square to at last open those stained-class doors to the Court of Angels and ascend those curving stairs to Club 33?
Still, we’ve got four of the BEST choices for self-isolating in Disney Parks’ lands on the last page… From plush beds to desert diners; firefighter workouts to alien snacks… Read on…
5. Cars Land at Disney California Adventure
Honestly, one of the best places to be trapped alone with your family might just be a ready-made town with all of its services dedicated directly to you. And in Cars Land, that’s exactly what you’d get: the entire Route 66 town of Radiator Springs with all of its businesses open just for you, with no worries about contacting other humans at all! Okay, so maybe it’s a little far-fetched to imagine Pixar’s automobile residents actually cooking up food and operating rides for you, think of what you could do with Radiator Springs to yourself.
Food wise, you not only have the patio dining of American diner classics at Flo’s V8 Cafe (with gorgeous sights overlooking the sensational Ornament Valley), but the fresh fruits of Fillmore’s Taste-In and the limitless snacks of the Cozy Cone Motel. (If only you could empty a cone out and add some beds so it could live up to its name…). The land’s signature drink, Red’s Apple Freeze, would make for a refreshing treat after you jog along the deserted desert highways, too, for your daily exercise.
Then, of course, imagine access to the land’s three attractions: Mater’s Junkyard Jamboree, the trackless Luigi’s Rollickin’ Roadsters, and the starring Modern Marvel: Radiator Springs Racers… A pretty good spread and an awesome set-up for a family. But best of all might be the chance to stand at the corner of Route 66 and Cross Street each night at sundown as the song “Life Could be a Dream” brings the town’s neon signs to glowing, humming life – a memorable and tear-inducing sight anytime, but most certainly during this not-so-happy moment in history.
6. Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge at Disneyland and Hollywood Studios
Of all the locales in Disney Parks today, there’s probably no more sought-after experience than Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge – in universe, the village of Black Spire Outpost on the planet of Batuu. Imagine having it all to yourself – imagine it being your neighborhood for quarantine! It’s true that this sprawling village offers plenty of things to do and places to eat (especially if we imagine the cash registers being turned off during your self-imposed one-land lockdown). Imagine it: you could dine on “alien” comfort food at Docking Bay 7; much on Kat Saka’s kettle corn; even refresh with a Blue Milk (if that’s your kind of thing).
Especially if the “paywall” were lifted, imagine the fun you could have tinkering with “scrap metal” in Dok Ondar’s and Savi’s, customizing your very own Lightsaber – without a doubt, the most expensive and sought-after souvenir around the parks today. And if you get lonely here, you can literally create a friend, building your very own Astromech Unit to wheel around the village.
It goes without saying that – if we keep imagining the rides would be accessible – you’d be the luckiest human on Earth with free-reign access to STAR WARS: Rise of the Resistance, a ride whose demand outweighs supply to the extent that folks will wake up just after midnight for an opportunity to ride if that’s what it takes.
Just about the only problem we can find with Galaxy’s Edge is that, technically, if we’re going by the idea that this isolation would be ‘in-universe” in terms of storytelling, you wouldn’t be isolating alone… Story-wise, Batuu isn’t exactly a great place to live. It’s meant to be an impoverished and war-town village of friendly (but struggling) inhabitants who live in the shabby structures and second-story villages that inhabit the town. In that sense, if it were under a strict quarantine, we can imagine First Order troopers roaming the town, literally forcing people to stay in their own cramped apartments. So while isolating here would certainly be interesting, if it were “real,” it wouldn’t be a cake walk.
7. Grizzly Peak at Disney California Adventure
Following in that same “trapped in a tropical paradise” scenario behind Pandora, Grizzly Peak at Disney California Adventure presents the perfect opportunity to be “stuck on vacation,” “roughing it” by quarantining in a gorgeous national park. In fact, this ’50s-set national forest of towering pines, misty rivers, lantern-lit trees, and erupting geysers is maybe one of the most romantic lands in any Disney park in the sense that it would be a perfect place to quarantine with someone special.
After all, you could take literal hikes through the Redwood Creek Challenge Trail (which also has climbing structures, watchtowers, ziplines, scavenger hunts, and spirit caves to explore) and relax around its firepit each night, take the old bypass road to the base of the snow-capped Grizzly Peak itself, or set up camp in the Grizzly Peak Airfield where the Smokejumpers Grill would be a great place to get takeout and where you can take off on the original Californian Modern Marvel: Soarin’.
And while you could stock up on canvas jackets, flannel shirts, and trail snacks at the log cabin Rushin’ River Outfitters and prep for nights of camping in the wilderness, we cheated a little by choosing Grizzly Peak… After all, the resort’s Grand Californian Hotel & Spa is actually inside Disney California Adventure and is part of the world-building of Grizzly Peak… in-universe, it’s the National Park’s “real” lodge, so even in self-isolation, you could have a AAA Four-Diamond night’s sleep with views overlooking the forests of the park.
In other words, Grizzly Peak gives you the chance to rough it… or not!
8. (Pick a country) in World Showcase at Epcot
Pick a country – any country! Really, the opportunity to quarantine inside World Showcase is too easy since it would give you practically unlimited food options, plenty of places to sleep, a ton of museums and exhibits to visit, a few rides, and, you know, unlimited alcohol. So instead we’ll challenge you here.
..If you could pick any one of World Showcase’s pavilions whose boundaries you got to be locked down into, which would you choose and why? The air-conditioned splendor and waterfront plaza of Mexico? The excitement and family-friendly offerings of Norway? The cuisine of Japan? The pubs of the United Kingdom? The snacks of France (with the chance to be a living test dummy on the Modern Marvel: Remy’s Ratatouille Adventure)? Whose food, souvenirs, attractions, and atmosphere could be your “home away from home” for the duration of social distancing?
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