Is there magic in the stars?
Whether or not you lend any credence to astrology – the practice of divining information about human matters from the patterns and movements of celestial objects – there’s one compelling connection none of us can deny: Twelve Disney Parks. Twelve signs of the Zodiac. With that idea in mind, I reached out to a lifelong friend, writer, Language Arts teacher (and personal Dr. Facilier), Ethan Thomas.
I sat down with Ethan for a really-for-real lesson on Astrology 101, determined to rise above “What kind of noodle are you based on your Zodiac sign” Buzzfeed quizzes to decide which Disney theme park best fits with each of the twelve signs. (Full disclosure, this is a friend who took my story about Disney’s decades-long inability to adapt Hans Christian Andersen’s Snow Queen into a workable film as a personal challenge and responded by writing a novel: Glass in the Snow, a free-to-read adaptation of the legend mixing in Norse mythology and rising to the challenge…)
Much to our surprise, pairing parks with the stars worked out pretty effortlessly! Somehow, each Disney Park’s “personality” seemed to slot intuitively into a corresponding sign… (Keep in mind, direct from Ethan, that the signs we typically associate with ourselves are our “sun signs” – technically, they show us not who we are, but who we are on the way to becoming…) Is this clear complementary relationship a product of divine intervention? We’ll let you decide… But trust us when we say that – whether you “believe” or not – looking at the parks through this lens may change the way you see their personalities, quirks, and relationships to one another…
By their nature, fire signs are high-energy. Parks we’d classify within this element tend to think mythologically, as if everything is part of a grand story. They can be temperamental, unpredictable, and volatile, with surprise announcements you don’t see coming. But is that a bad thing? After all, it means that fire signs are not afraid of chaos. They love and embrace change and hate boredom. At the end of the day, “Fire” parks are defined by evolution, and committed to the next hot thing. Which parks do you have in mind for this?
Aries
Birth dates: March 21 – April 19
Aries is the youngest sign of the Zodiac, and a high-energy fire sign at that. As a result, it’s the sign of new beginnings; yearning for a sense of adventure, action, and movement with a cause to fight for. An Aries can be impatient, energetic, and easily bored. They’re always on the move, but hold no grudges about past slights. Frankly, Aries can be surprisingly unaware of others’ opinions at all! Like a hero and their “I Want” song gearing up for adventure, Aries is ready to hit the road and make things happen.
Altogether, an Aries is defined by their need for a goal to reach for.
That makes this one a pretty easy fit. It must be Hong Kong Disneyland. Despite not being the newest Disney Park, it somehow feels like the youngest; it’s a park that’s warm-hearted and generous, but childish and still learning. And as a park literally defined by never-ending growth spurts and reimaginings to right past wrongs, it’s the perfect icon of the start of the Zodiac; a fresh, young park still finding its footing, but burning bright as it does. The park perpetually keeps a goal on the horizon and moves steadily toward it.
Leo
Birth dates: July 23 – August 22
The sign Leo is ruled by the sun… and not surprisingly, Leos act like they’re the center of the universe. Despite their bravado and bluster, Leos really aren’t as confident as they appear, and in fact many Leos judge their importance by whether or not other people see them as important. They maintain a fiery idealism and extraordinary extravagance. Their goal is to be as big and as grand as possible without worrying about the bills. Leos are horizon-chasers who must learn along the way that the real quest may be an inner one…
A Leo needs to feel that they’ve left a legacy.
Yep, it must be Shanghai Disneyland. The youngest Disney Park on Earth retains the unpredictability and perpetual motion of fire signs, but unlike the young and impetuous Hong Kong Disneyland with its goal to fight for, there’s a sturdiness, grandness, and pride to Shanghai Disneyland; a self-bestowed status as a “new icon” of the next generation of Disney Parks. Truly built with a seemingly bottomless budget, this park is one of intentional extravagance and self-importance – the living symbol of a Leo.
Sagittarius
Birth dates: November 22 – December 21
Rounding out the fire signs in the most mature of the three is Sagittarius, the archer. Your textbook Sagittarius likes to shoot an arrow toward the horizon and chase it. Rounding out the fiery zeal and commitment to the “next hot thing” exemplified by fire, Sagittarius revels in the journey; constantly moving, constantly getting what they want… and constantly growing tired of it. Sagittarius is stricken by “FOMO” (fear of missing out) and thus is always changing shape and reinventing.
Most tellingly, a Sagittarius has a grand vision that can never fully manifest.
Congratulations Sagittarius sun signs… you are best represented by Disney California Adventure. This is a park whose journey has become legendary (literally… we wrote about it in an in-depth special feature tracking the park’s original form, and its era(s) of rebirth). After successfully undoing the park’s flat, comical, satirical opening day tone, Imagineers recast California Adventure as a built-out, romantic, idealized park perfectly complementing Disneyland. But it’s never enough. The continued evolution of the park since (axing its Californian anchor attractions in favor of Marvel and Pixar) is Sagittarius incarnate: the journey never ends, and the vision never fully materializes between reinventions.
Earth signs tend to be… well… earthy. As this element suggests, Earth signs are deeply connected (and thus, tethered) to the physical world. To Earth signs, there is one reality, and dreaminess and fantasy don’t always resonate. To some, that makes Earth signs appear narrow-minded; it means they lack vision; that they’re almost dogmatic in their adherence to realism, and may neglect their “inner child.” But many Earth signs have a secret longing for the spiritual, the paranormal, or a sign of the bigger picture they’re not always great at seeing. Whereas some parks make magic real, “Earth” parks make reality magical.
Taurus
Birth dates: April 20 – May 20
Again the “youngest” of the Earth signs, Taurus is ruled by Venus, the goddess of love and pleasure. And quite unlike the fire sign that precedes it, Taurus is all about serenity and prefers for things to stay the same. Taurus tends to be black and white in their approach, preferring things to be simple and uncomplicated. They focus on reality and typically don’t take on lofty or risky goals.
Sometimes unambitious, Taurus only acts when they’re certain it will go in their favor, defining their moments by “before” a change and “after” a change.
At the crushing intersection of reality, sameness, and timeline-defining changes stands Disney’s Hollywood Studios. Reality? That’s the harsh truth of its “studio” origin, developed in-utero as a peek “behind the scenes.” Sameness? Only a “Taurus” park could still be running no less than three stage shows that have run continuously for thirty years without a single notable update. Change? It must be that this park is continuously redefined by each new addition, culminating of course in Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge – a project that redefined the park… but admittedly, with a guaranteed home run and very little risk involved.
Virgo
Birth dates: August 23 – September 22
Virgo is not for sale. Put another way, Virgo is the sign that’s about integrity and personal sovereignty. Despite commonly being simplified as “neat freaks,” that image is really drawn from Virgo’s need for control over randomness. Virgos like to classify and order things; to observe life, and to synthesize things together harmoniously.
Seeking wholeness, Virgos tend to be to be incredibly sensitive and keenly aware of the harsh realities of the world.
The best fit here must be Disney’s Animal Kingdom, a park that plays off of deep and powerful ‘big ideas’ – the inherent value of nature and the story of humanity growing alongside and within it. The park’s starring feature (its animals) are interspersed among National Geographic-esque recreations of African and Asian villages, conveying the cultures and contexts of the natural world and the human world’s harmonious coexistence. Though (in true “Earth sign” fashion) the park initially addressed the “harsh realities” of the animal kingdom head on, it’s largely softened its delivery over the years.
And fitting Earth sign’s secret desire for the supernatural to break up the order they crave, the park’s never-built Possibilityland: Beastly Kingdom may never have made it off the drawing board, but the Modern Marvel: Expedition Everest and Pandora – The World of Avatar invited imagined creatures into the otherwise grounded park in big ways.
Capricorn
Birth dates: December 22 – January 19
The eldest of the Earth signs, Capricorn is symbolised by a fish-goat. The goat represents ambition and success while the fish symbolizes wisdom, and likewise the Capricorn brings impossible parts together. They seek wisdom gained from experience and quickly learn to play the long game. To that end, Capricorns may have hard childhoods, learning that luck and happiness are untrustworthy emotions early on until experience proves otherwise.
Capricorns have a burning sense of duty, and a desire to make the world better even if they have to suffer to prove they themselves are worthy of happiness.
Reviewing that, it’s hard to imagine any park better aligned to Capricorn than EPCOT. Literally bringing together two dissimilar halves (the industrial ambition of Future World and the cultural wisdom of World Showcase), the park has very much learned to play the long game. After its initial foundations began to crumble at its 10th anniversary (when sponsorship contracts began to expire), EPCOT has stuck in there. While fans will forever debate the success of its once-glowing ambition to change the world, at least all can agree that the park has suffered… whether it ultimately reaches happiness is yet to be determined.
“Childlike, naive, and trusting,” air signs are filled with curiosity and wonder. They can be great communicators and tend to be highly intellectual. While Fire signs are high-energy and Earth signs are realistic, Air signs are big picture people who sometimes fail to see the details. Rather, they like to know how things work, observing patterns, analyzing, and thinking logically. Compared to the other signs, “Air” parks are sometimes criticized as cold and unfeeling, but are master communicators with refined, logical, and intelligent beauty.
Gemini
Birth dates: May 21 – June 20
“Everyone is interesting to a Gemini.” In part, that’s because they love to learn, and to share what they learn. A Gemini doesn’t like being told what to think, but notices small details and then “zooms out” to draw connections. Geminis are often seen as social butterflies, their personalities borrowing from those they know.
A “jack of all trades, master of none,” Geminis are great mimics, seeking to be well-informed; they are bridge-builders, interpreters, messengers, and translators of good ideas.
There’s no park that fits this bill greater than Tokyo Disneyland, which literally was created by hand-selecting elements of both Disneyland and Magic Kingdom. When we say Air signs observe patterns, analyze, and figure out how things work, we’re practically describing the process that went into planning the park, since one of the most sensational feats Tokyo Disneyland achieved was refining Disney standards based on the logistics and operations of crowd control. Tokyo Disneyland expertly mimicked what worked, then translated those good ideas (literally) to create an ideal form.
Libra
Birth dates: September 23 – October 22
Though Air signs tend to be intellectual and analytical, Libra has a unique internal conflict: it’s ruled by Venus, the goddess of love. That’s why Libras value relationships. They’re acutely aware of others and tend to measure themselves against others. Libras have a great desire to be liked. They shy away from any negative emotions and search for perfection. They naturally want to please everybody.
They can come off as too charming – almost two-faced – but Libras are genuinely looking for the good in everyone, and use relationships to escape the harshness of reality.
There’s one Disney Park that manages to be both intellectual (mastering logistics, capacity, and master-planning) but also lovely and enchanting: Magic Kingdom. Sometimes accused of being the “corporate” version of its older sister, it might be kinder to simply see that as a classic Air sign – a masterclass on taking the haphazard invention of Disneyland and figuring out how it works, then applying those patterns to be perfectly pleasant and likeable. You can even argue that some imagine Magic Kingdom as “two-faced” – a corporate, capitalist symbol – even if they’d never accuse diminutive Disneyland of the same, but to our thinking, it’s a classic Libra trying to build relationships but with intellect and emotion in equal parts.
Aquarius
Birth dates: January 20 – February 18
The third and latest Air sign is Aquarius, represented by the water-bearer pouring out water (but, you’ll often see, not getting their own hands wet). That makes sense, because Aquarius is all about ideals. Having “zoomed out” from the details and analysis as we move through the Air signs, Aquarius is focused on the big picture. Balanced between Saturn (seeking structure) and Uranus (resisting structure), Aquarius is a sign that’s good with problem-solving, but tends to think rather than feel their way out of emotional problems that require the latter.
In that way, Aquarians don’t understand their own emotions and try to solve them with intellect, sometimes exhibiting flashes of genius the world isn’t ready for.
The cool thing is, there’s an easy fit here: Disneyland Paris. The park skillfully balanced detail and “big picture” thinking and somehow struck a balance between adhering to the tried-and-true Disneyland formula while altogether reinventing it for European audiences. The result was flashes of brilliance (like the Modern Marvels: Phantom Manor and Space Mountain: De la Terre á la Lune) that went unnoticed. In an effort to recoup that, the park tried to think its way out of a problem that was much more emotional than logical: its rejection by the local culture.
Think about it: Tokyo Disneyland, Magic Kingdom, and Disneyland Paris are technically so similar. On paper, their ride lineups are nearly identical. And yet their personalities are so different. That’s what makes it feel appropriate that they’re all Air signs, but that they seem to evolve as they go from pure intellect, to emotional intelligence, and now to a sort of crescendo of creative genius; flashes of expression the world wasn’t ready for. And that leads us to the last element…
Water signs are the most primitive signs; after all, when Earth was new, it was covered in water. Just as Air signs operate off logic and intellect, water is all about feeling. “If I feel it, it’s true.” While Earth signs emphasize one reality, Water signs find reality blurry and subjective. They act emotionally and on instinct, creating their own worlds. Water takes the shape of the container it’s poured into, and similarly, Water signs are subtle, complex, and constantly changing. They process their ideals deep inside and can’t always restate or summarize them. “Water” parks are complex, always changing, and follow their instinct, but develop a strong sense of beauty and aesthetic along the way.
Cancer
Birth dates: June 21 – July 22
As the first and least practiced water sign, Cancers are defined by their need for emotional security and the comfort of familiarity. They tend to undergo periods of change and growth, but to quickly recede back into their shell. In so doing, Cancers can become emotional hoarders, afraid to let go. By remaining in their shells, they may come across as cold… but in reality, they’re sensitive and merely trying to protect themselves.
Cancers undergo creative cycles of depression and withdrawal between inspirations, ever seeking security and afraid to let things go.
Don’t hate us, but it’s Walt Disney Studios Park at Disneyland Paris. Sorry folks – someone had to get it! But really, this itty-bitty Parisian park (once the subject of its own Declassified Disaster: Walt Disney Studios exposè) doesn’t have to be the villain it’s been made out to be. And as a matter of fact, it won’t be for long. There’s no better description for this park than that paragraph above; it’s a park ebbing and flowing emotionally with bursts of creativity, then the harsh realities of its origin. But the important thing for Cancers and for Walt Disney Studios is to learn to let go and embrace an unknown future…
Scorpio
Birth dates: October 23 – November 21
Mysterious and enigmatic, Scorpios are often imagined as loners. But that’s not really true. Instead, Scorpios create deep, intense, specialized relationships. They tend to control themselves, control others, and control the world around them. Like any Water sign, they’re emotional and instinctual, opting for feeling over Fire’s energy, Earth’s realism, or Air’s logic. And as anyone who’s dated a Scorpio will tell you, they are patient, but know how to hold a grudge.
Scorpios look back on their lives and see distinct chapters, but prefer to burn each chapter as they go, starting anew every time.
Despite the reputation Scorpios have, we’ll offer an unexpected fit: Disneyland. Remember how Magic Kingdom (a Libra) sought to ignore dark feelings? Disneyland, as a Scorpio, can tune into those dark undercurrents, with an eerie Indiana Jones inspired narrative blanketed across Adventureland, the impoverished Batuu, the jazzy and haunting New Orleans Square, and more “PG” rides like Rise of the Resistance, Star Tours, and Temple of the Forbidden Eye that would never jive with Magic Kingdom’s insistence on strictly G-rated fairy tales and light. (That’s why we think if the Lost Legend: Alien Encounter had premiered at Disneyland as planned, it might still be open).
But the most Scorpio element of Disneyland must be that bolded line above. Disneyland has been there through it all. Literally. From Walt Disney to Bob Chapek, the park’s story is one of eras bookmarked against one another, with new visions constantly overtaking old. Somehow, the result is a park where Peter Pan, Indiana Jones, Roger Rabbit, Kylo Ren, the Tiki Birds, and Mr. Toad all feel essential. And trust us, Disneyland and its fans never forget a slight against the park…
Pisces
Birth dates: February 19 – March 20
The final sign of the Zodiac (and thus, the most developed over many lifetimes) is Pisces, the fish. This is the sign of the mystic, which pursues what the rest of humanity discards. Pisces are in tune with the greater world, and have a tremendous awareness of a greater reality. They are intensely emotionally receptive and have intense empathy. Pisces is romantic and may even create drama and act self-destructively because suffering is romantic.
Ultimately, Pisces do things to excess; they are the great creators; they are imaginative dreamers who see into another world and share it with the real world.
There’s just one Disney Park left, and it couldn’t be a better fit: Tokyo DisneySea. The apex of the Zodiac and the pinnacle of Imagineering unite (and in the most developed Water sign, no less). Literally taking the discarded plans U.S. Disney Parks didn’t or couldn’t finance, DisneySea is like visiting another world; it’s an ultra-ambitious, impossibly romantic park that’s epic in both scale and message. Just as an example of how it differentiates itself so wildly from any other park, its centerpiece attraction is the Modern Marvel: Journey to the Center of the Earth, a literary masterpiece that serves as a Mecca for Imagineering fans the world over.
Mystical, adventurous, and grand, DisneySea takes everything you love about Disney Parks and cranks it up to a 15. It’s a living embodiment of the power of themed entertainment design, and a park born of heart and emotion.
Parkstrology
“Believe” in it or not, looking at Disney Parks through the lens of the stars actually does help add a new layer or context on top of them, and a compelling new narrative for their personalities, similarities, and differences… Again it’s thanks to my personal friend Ethan Thomas that this divine dissection is even possible, and I sincerely encourage you to tap over to his free-to-read novel, Glass in the Snow, merging Norse mythology and the Snow Queen mythos into a must-read frozen adventure.
(By the way, you can find the twelve signs of the Zodiac in Disneyland… Know where?)
