Look… not every ride can be a classic. If you’ve read any entries in our in-depth Declassified Disaster series, you know full well that the story of Disney Parks is one filled with collosal failures, unbelievable flops, and attractions that just turn out to be bad decisions born of a specific time, mindset, or leadership.
More often than not, the difference between a ride fans love and one they loathe is just what a ride replaced, what was lost from sketch to reality, or – worst of all – how it doesn’t live up to fans’ expectations. And frankly, there’s just something interesting about things going wrong… It’s interesting when an attraction fails to find the audience Disney’s designers had hoped… and often, how they own up to the mistake by updating, changing, replacing, or outright closing projects that don’t find their footing.
Today, we’ve collected seven of the “worst” Disney attractions of the century (so far) to share our thoughts on why these projects just didn’t land. Now, granted, each was worked on by highly-skilled artists, designers, and writers whose work we don’t discount… and it’s important to remember that whatever your least favorite ride might be, millions upon millions of people love it, care about it, and have spectacular memories on it. So take our opinions for a grain of salt, and share your own 21st century disaster condenters in the comments below or when you share this feature with friends and family!
In the meantime, we’ll start with a controversial choice… but at least give us the benefit of the doubt to hear why!
7. Millennium Falcon: Smugglers Run
Location: Disneyland and Disney’s Hollywood Studios
Opened: 2019
We know, we know… Putting Disney’s brand new hundred-million-dollar E-Ticket on a list of the worst rides of the century isn’t exactly a great way to earn your trust. But its inclusion here isn’t meant to be clickbait, and putting it first really means it’s the least bad. Frankly, Smugglers Run’s main fault might be that it had more riding on it than Disney had planned. Ostensibly the “secondary” ride in the billion-dollar Galaxy’s Edge expansion, the interactive gaming simulator was designed to complement the more extravagent Rise of the Resistance, but ended up being tossed into the spotlight when Rise’s opening was delayed by nearly a year on both coasts.
The end result is somewhat equivalent to Pandora opening just with Navi River Journey; Diagon Alley with only the Hogwarts Express; Cars Land with just Mater’s Junkyard Jamboree… and the land’s reception and attendance apparently struggled accordingly.
Look, the fact of the matter is that whatever you thought Millennium Falcon: Smugglers Run would be, it’s probably not what it turned out to be. While the opportunity to pilot the Millennium Falcon may be a dream come true for generations of film fans, it didn’t translate quite the way many had hoped. Early marketing (above) showed families zipping along the sunlit spires of Batuu, diving into canyons and gleefully twisting through blue skies in a boundless, joyful, and spectacular bonding experience. And frankly, that’s a ride we’d love to take!
In reality, guests are (by necessity, pandemic-excluded) grouped with strangers and assigned retroactively-created roles. Only two of each cabin’s six get the enviable job of being “pilots,” cleverly controlling the cab’s horizontal and vertical motion, respectively. The other two thirds of riders are relegated to “engineers” and “gunners,” which amount to mashing light-up buttons. While some folks adore the “next generation” of interactive ride and its gaming platform, many report being frustrated by the focus on gameplay… and worse, the reliance on (or pressure from) total strangers to shape your experience… Imagine waiting your whole life (and in an hour-long queue) to take the controls of the Falcon, only to have two six year olds assigned “pilot” roles with no idea what to do… or worse, to have strangers chiding you for failing to act quickly enough to fire a harpoon or avoid an obstacle.
What’s more, the promised freewheeling flight around Batuu is no where to be seen. Instead, riders immediately make a lightspeed jump to a hazy, industrial, urban planet at dreary sunset smashing through traffic and slamming against buildings, made all the more disorienting and incoherent by the continuous flash of gunners’ blue and red laser blasts filling riders’ field of vision. And given the land’s placement in the newer timeline of Disney’s sequel trilogy, neither Han Solo nor Chewbacca is anywhere to be seen (without a little cheat code, at least), leaving the likeable but largely-unknown Hondo Onaka as the anchor character of the ride.
Millennium Falcon: Smugglers Run is by no means a failure. And if it had opened as the “secondary” attraction it was meant to be, maybe it would be more beloved by fans. But in terms of carrying the weight placed on its shoulders, it’s clearly a bit of a stumble, and we wouldn’t be surprised to see new missions (and old characters) added to the ride in the future… And honestly, in some alternate reality, Galaxy’s Edge might have a peaceful Omnimover “scouting pod ride” through the forests of Batuu in its place, and that would be okay, too!
6. Incredicoaster
Location: Disney California Adventure
Opened: 2018
Yet another high profile project that just didn’t quite meet expectations, the transformation of Disney California Adventure’s Intamin launched looping coaster – California Screamin’ – into the IP-friendly Incredicoaster was always an odd choice. Part of the “second wave” of transformation to park after (and seemingly undoing much of the purpose of) its 2012 relaunch, the transformation of Paradise Pier into Pixar Pier was one no one saw coming (and even fewer asked for) when it was announced at the 2017 D23 Expo. A land of contradictions, the “new” Pixar Pier doubled down on the elegant, enchanting, and gorgeous Victorian architecture that its predecessor’s 2012 reimagining had begun… but then overlayed the land with mis-matched “neighborhoods” dedicated to high-earning Pixar franchises.
Stylized as a turn-of-the-century wooden coaster enveloping the curving boardwalk, California Screamin’ and the entrance plaza to it were absorbed into Pixar’s The Incredibles. A “neighborhood” of mid-century modern architecture in the midst of a Victorian pier sets the stage for a ride that’s proudly filled with contradictions… For example, news footage in the ride’s queue depicts the “live” ribbon cutting of the ride where the ever-teenage Violet reports how lame it is that they’re just naming an old roller coaster in her family’s honor, with Edna Mode explaining how hot synergy is right now.
It would be one thing if the Incredicoaster were a multi-media masterpiece, filling the coaster’s old “scream tubes” with wraparound-LED screens, projection effects, lasers, or other sensational special effects. Instead, the mini-scenes are populated by static mannquins of the Incredibles team with absolutely no movement… not even inner-projected faces! While some of the scenes pass quickly enough to disguise the lack of kinetics, it’s wildly apparent for most that Disney just didn’t invest much in this project – which fits with rumors that Pixar Pier was a forced rush-job institgated by now-CEO Bob Chapek who wanted hot IPs in California Adventure and practically bet that Imagineering couldn’t get the job done quickly and cheaply.
Yes, Imagineers managed to turn the formerly-bare-steel coaster into a “story coaster” (by sending guests racing around for baby Jack Jack, whose randomized powers see him shoot laser eyes, “go gooey,” catch on fire, and multiply along the ride’s course)… but the execution is so embarrassing that it’s hard to believe the final product got approved. I mean, couldn’t they at least have provided articulating faces for the characters? At least have the multiplied Jack Jack’s cling to the coaster’s structure in the final helix rather than be bolted to poles affixed to rooftops, not even rotating? The whole thing is just so bland, so flat, and so static, it feels like a bit of a downgrade were it not for the spectacular score of Michael Giacchino.
5. Mission: SPACE
Location: Epcot
Opened: 2003
As Disney fans will tell you, Epcot has always been a work in progress. After its pursuit of its ideal self arguably peaked in the late ’80s, the park has since been on a relatively steady decline in terms of its clarity and focus. Where once each of its pavilions featured an epic, educational dark ride through the history and future of industries, a new generation of piecemeal experiences has brought in characters, thrill rides, and mis-matched ’80s throwbacks that lack the scale, beauty, and “brains” of the master-planned original project.
No ride is more emblematic of that shift than Mission: SPACE. Replacing the park’s one-time thesis – the Lost Legend: Horizons – Mission: SPACE arrived in an era before Disney’s IP-infatuation, but after its ambitious and extravagant Ride the Movies era. Touted as a new classic that would soon find its way to Tomorrowlands across the globe, Disney banked big on an ultra-intense and highly-technological thrill ride. Mission: SPACE utilizes centrifuge technology to place guests into four-person pods, subject to 2.5 Gs of force. And unlike a roller coaster where that more-than-doubling of a person’s weight occurs only at the bottom of a hill before pulling out again, on Mission: SPACE, it’s sustained, creating highs and lows of gravitational forces experienced on Earth solely by astronauts in training… and Mission: SPACE riders…
It’s well known for causing issues as minor as motion sickness, and at least two riders have died after the experience – both related to pre-existing conditions. In 2006, two of the ride’s four multi-million dollar centrifuges were essentially decomissioned and dedicated to a less-intense “Green Mission,” axing the G-force and keeping just the motion-based movement… certainly not what Disney hoped from the $100 million ride. And on the larger scale, Mission: SPACE never became the anchor attraction Disney hoped and was never duplicated elsewhere. Quite the contrary, the ride is perhaps the dictionary definition of a “one and done” for many people thanks to its incredibly intense and physically trying experience.
In 2017, the “Green Mission” finally got its own custom ride video while the high-intensity “Orange Mission” got a refresh of its own. But altogether, Mission: SPACE probably represents the worst of the “new” Epcot and it’s certainly one of the most frustrating Disney Rides of the 21st century if only because of the transformation it represents. And speaking of poorly received rides at EPCOT in the 21st century…
4. Journey into Imagination with Figment
Location: Epcot
Opened: 2002
As unfortunate as it sounds, yet another of the worst Disney attractions of this century is most certainly at Epcot… but unlike Mission: SPACE which is at least in part made worse by knowing what it replaced, you could say that Journey Into Imagination with Figment is actually better because of what it replaced.
You know the story… In 1983, EPCOT Center’s Imagination pavilion gained its own lengthy, musical, educational, and iconic dark ride – the Lost Legend: Journey into Imagination. A flight of fancy into realms of art, literature, and science, this epic dark ride introduced fans to two of the most beloved original characters ever created just for Disney Parks: the inventive Dreamfinder and his purple dragon Figment. To the tune of the timeless “One Little Spark,” the duo whisked guests away in search of “sparks” of inspiration to power new ideas – a sort of fancy-free, foundational fit for the park’s otherwise solemn and scientific purposes.
In 1999, the ride was cut. Literally. An ill-fated, low-budget, New Millennium attempt to update the pavilion saw Dreamfinder and Figment ousted in favor of a sterile tour through the scholarly Imagination Institute (one of our tell-tale signs of a “bad” attraction story). With Monty Python’s Eric Idle on board as a new host studying imagination, the dark ride’s layout was physically halved, losing its most iconic scene entirely, and transformed into what is almost inarguably the worst dark ride Walt Disney World has ever, ever hosted. It was bad. So bad, in fact, that we immortalized the experience in a standalone feature – Declassified Disasters: Journey into YOUR Imagination – just to make sure we never forgot the lessons learned. Frankly, that version of the ride would probably top this list of the worst attractions except that it opened last century.
Disney’s internal evaluation allegedly suggested that the new ride was despised… So much so that they initiated a quick fix solution. After barely two years (just long enough to survive Epcot’s Millennium Celebration), the ride was closed again. On a shoestring budget, designers were given the unenviable task of keeping as much as possible from the hated 1999 version while increasing guest satisfaction.
The resulting ride – Journey into Imagination With Figment – continues to play to this day. It’s… fine? It looks like what it is: an early 2000s quick fix that tried its best to inexpensively reintroduce a CGI figment wherever possible, cranking up the chaos and fun and reinserting “One Little Spark.” But no one would ever argue that the “fixed” ride should still be limping along two decades later in its Band-aided form. All on its own merits, Journey into Imagination With Figment is a pretty bad ride, even if it’s an improvement over its short-lived 1999 predecessor.
Unfortunately, EPCOT’s ongoing reinvention hadn’t yet announced a new rebirth for the Imagination pavilion (though one was heavily hinted and rumored), and is even less likely to now that the project is allegedly being downsized due to the 2020 pandemic.
3. Stitch’s Great Escape
Location: Magic Kingdom
Opened: 2004 – 2018
There’s probably no Disney Parks attraction quite as infamous as Stitch’s Great Escape. The theater-in-the-round special effects extravaganza was technically the fourth inhabitant of the showbuilding north along Magic Kingdom’s Tomorrowland entryway, which opened with the park in 1971 as Flight to the Moon, then in 1975 as Mission to Mars. As any Disney Parks aficianado will tell you, though, the circular theater experience earned its most definitive renter in 1994 when – as part of a sweeping and still-celebrated New Tomorrowland – the theater became t he demonstration hall of the Tomorrowland Interplanetary Conference Center. Yes, the Lost Legend: Alien Encounter might’ve traumatized a generation of Millennials… but it also set the stage for one hell of an experience.
Suffice it to say that the hideous, insectoid alien released onto unsuspecting Magic Kingdom crowds by way of in-your-face special effects, drool, blood splatters, 3D audio, and one spectacularly monstrous Audio Animatronics figure didn’t make many parents happy. The wacko, out-of-this-world product of the cinematic Ride the Movies era was – frankly – a bit of a mess, beloved now as a cult classic.
But in the early 2000s, Disney Imagineers – famously under a mandate of Eisner’s direct-to-video era – made what seemed like a sensible swap, replacing the terrifying alien with the infantile Stitch from 2002’s Lilo & Stitch. The troublemaking invader still terrorized guests, but with bouncing, burps, and spit. As it turned out, Stitch’s Great Escape landed a little too late to capitalize on the character’s meteoric rise… and unfortunately, the retooled experience ended up being just as terrifying for kids while (no pun intended) alienating thrillseekers who now reverered the original as an Imagineering icon.
Stitch’s Great Escape closed permanently after the Christmas 2017 season without much fanfare… or even an official announcement. For two and a half years, the prime real estate along Tomorrowland’s entry simply remained closed until Disney made it official in July 2020, finally fessing up that the show would never return.
If you’ve got to get to the bottom of how this attraction ever came to be to begin with, what it contained, and what could be next for the space, we’ve got the full story in a standalone feature – Declassified Disasters: Stitch’s Great Escape.
2. Superstar Limo
Location: Disney’s California Adventure
Opened: 2001 – 2002
It’s a ride so bad, it practically lives in infamy… “The worst Disney dark ride ever.” One look at the ride and you can see why.
Superstar Limo was a victim of circumstance. The ride was born at the wrong place and the wrong time. Crafted by committee, congealed in the direct-to-video humor of the early 2000s, and sapped of budget by its corporate overlords, the ride was perhaps the perfect representation of the park it opened in: Disney’s California Adventure. A cynical, budget-cut creation meant to represent a bold, edgy, modern counterpart to the tired, old-fashioned, idealized Disneyland, in California Adventure, the time was now and the place was here!
Perfect evidence of the park’s satirical spoof of modern California was the Hollywood Pictures Backlot. Though we know by way of the Disney-MGM Studios that Imagineers could’ve created a romanticized, glamorous, glittering recreation of the heyday of Hollywood reigned over by the Chinese Theater or the Hollywood Tower Hotel, California’s land instead was a Hollywood studio’s set… of Hollywood.
A cheap, plywood bouelvard of flimsy facades terminating in a “blue sky” backdrop with punny retail signs spoofing big screen classics and alluding to the era’s paparazzi culture, sex abuse scandals, and the rise of the gossip tabloid.
As for its one, single ride (which, by the way, was the park’s only dark ride)? Superstar Limo was almost exhaustingly bad. It was shallow. Cheap. Unfunny. Packed with embarassing references to Los Angeles, puns only Michael Eisner and his Hollywood executive friends would ever grasp, and populated with C-List stars already on Disney’s payroll. The slow-moving ride through Hollywood’s elite neighborhoods was such an unmitigated disaster, it closed after less than a year… even with no plans to replace it! In other words, California Adventure was simply stronger with no dark ride at all than with Superstar Limo.
If you’re brave, you can dig into the complete history of the ride – including how and why it came to be and a depressing drive through its scenes – in a full standalone feature – Declassified Disasters: Superstar Limo.
1. Studio Tram Tour: Behind the Magic
Location: Walt Disney Studios Park
Opened: 2002 – 2020
Okay, look… Stitch’s Great Escape was awful. Superstar Limo was too. But frankly, there’s one Disney Parks attraction so abysmally bad, it’s hard to believe it ever existed to begin with… much less that it continues to exist today. For those of you “lucky” enough to have visited Walt Disney Studios Park at Disneyland Paris (or the next-best thing, our Declassified Disaster: Walt Disney Studios walkthrough of the park), you’ve seen firsthand just what happens when Disney doesn’t try. When the park opened in 2002 (above), it had three rides. Three. The second gate… next to Disneyland Paris… had three rides. One was a clone of Rock ‘n’ Roller Coaster. The other was a Magic Carpets Over Agrabah spinner. And the last was Behind the Magic: Studio Tram Tour.
Given that it’s one of the most-read features on Theme Park Tourist, you may already be familiar with the concept by way of our in-depth look at another Declassified Disaster: The Backstage Studio Tour that once traversed the “behind the scenes” of the Disney-MGM Studios in Florida. But at least Orlando’s “studio tram tour” actually had… well… a studio!
Paris’ studio tour somehow existed without a studio in sight. Instead, riders would pile into trams to whisked through… well… fields and woodlands forming the upper boundary of the tiny park, occasionally pausing to view sets from surefire hits like ABC’s 2002 miniseries Dinotopia. The experience did include two staged special effects encounters at extreme ends of the course: Catastrophe Canyon (cloned from the Disney-MGM Studios) and a pass through a ruined London streetscape where a single flamethrower effect was meant to evoke Touchstone’s 2002 box office flop Reign of Fire. The barren experience was punctuated by in-cab, ’90s quality videos hosted by Jeremy Irons and Irène Jacob (in English and French, respectively) pontificating on all the elements the tour did not include, like costumes, soundstages, cameras, lighting, and more. The ride gradually shrank more and more as new additions to the tiny park required rerouting the pointless attraction.
Honestly, we dare you to sit down and focus on the whole attraction without skipping ahead. And this is how it looked in 2019!
And the Behind the Magic tour might be relegated to mere urban legend… if it hadn’t existed until 2020! Yes, Walt Disney Studios’ Studio Tram Tour only ceased operation on January 5, 2020 – inevitable given that the ride awkwardly served as an artificial boundary to the tiny park, hemming it in with its course that hugged the Y-shaped upper border. Pending the results of the pandemic closures, that boundary needed broken to make way for the enormous reimagining theoretically en route to the park, adding lands themed to Marvel, Star Wars, and Frozen in previously-unused land… But the strangest part of it all? The Studio Tram Tour just will. Not. Die.
In a move absolutely no one asked for, the ride will be shortened again as it takes on a new form. Soon to begin departing from Toy Story Land, the Cars Route 66 Road Rally seems to serve the singular purpose of shuttling guests to Catastrophe Canyon (which will almost-unbelievably just have its exploding tanker truck affixed with Cars-esque eyes and a Dinoco logo).
We can appreciate that Walt Disney Studios needs all the ride capacity it can get in the lead-up to its expansion, but salvaging the Studio Tram Tour in its most embarrassing edit yet is… well… a choice.
