Theme parks are pretty fantastical places, packed with impressive scenery and towering rides. It’s no surprise, then, that they’ve been used as the setting for major movies and television shows on many occasions.
Unfortunately for the guests at these fictional theme parks, things tend to go awry very quickly. Rather than leisurely cruising around on boat rides, they are DEVOURED by hungry sharks. Instead of experiencing high-speed thrills on roller coasters, they are CHASED by hungry dinosaurs. And rather than being greeted by friendly staff, they are SHOT AT by malfunctioning robots.
Despite this, some of those fictional theme parks look pretty cool. Here are five of the very best!
5. Delos (Westworld, 1973)
Delos is the ultimate theme park. Pitched as a luxury vacation spot for wealthy tourists, it literally allows guests to step back in time and become a character in another world. Helping them to play this role are the resort’s “staff” – robots that are completely indistinguishable (on the outside, at least) from humans.
The attractions:
Delos is split into three lands, each of which is completely immersive and fully-realised:
West World – Recreates the Wild West, allowing guests to have thrilling shoot-outs with gunslingers in which they always emerge victorious. To celebrate, why not grab a drink at the saloon, where there are dancing girls aplenty.
Medieval World – Grab a sword and get ready to duel it out over the heart of the Queen. Your room is serviced by a beautiful robotic maid, who won’t tell your wife what you get up to.
Roman World – enter the world of the Romans, where hunky gladiators are ready to sweep you off your feet.
The problem:
It seems the robots aren’t too happy about being enslaved. They won’t stick to their roles – and may just decide to fight back for real when you challenge them to a duel.
4. Pacific Playland (Zombieland, 2009)
The attractions:
Blast off – the main ride seen in the movie is Blast Off, a towering drop tower that is simple enough to operate that two untrained teenage girls can fire it up and jump on board.
Game booths – games of chance and skill are a fixture at most amusement parks. They also double as a handy place from which to mow down large numbers of the undead.
The problem:
It seems that nobody informed the zombies that Pacific Playland should be uninfested. They are present in large numbers, ready to tear visitors limb-from-limb.
3. SeaWorld (Jaws 3-D, 1983)
Here’s a movie theme park that you can actually visit – SeaWorld Orlando, where Jaws 3-D was set. Just as in real life, the fictional version of the park offers a variety of marine life exhibits and live shows. However, in the movie the park is located on the coast, rather than in landlocked Orlando.
The attractions:
Water skiing show – SeaWorld’s skillful water skiers demonstrate their ability to perform stunts…and attempt to avoid the jaws of a hungry great white shark.
Underwater tunnels – gaze out on beautiful sea creatures, including the aforementioned shark. Be warned: the glass may not be shatterproof.
The problem:
That shark isn’t really supposed to be at SeaWorld. He’s pretty hungry…and the guests and staff sure look tasty.
2. Itchy & Scratchy Land (The Simpsons, 1994)
The leading theme park resort in The Simpsons world is Itchy & Scratchy Land, based on the cartoon cat and mouse that spend most of their time trying to kill each other. It bears more than a passing resemblance to Walt Disney World, complete with a Pleasure Island-style adults-only area. It’s the place where nothing can “possi-bligh” go wrong, even though it’s populated with Westworld-style robots.
The attractions:
The four “lands” at the park are Torture Land, Explosion Land, Searing Gas Pain Land and Unnecessary Surgery Land.
Log ride – a log flume with a twist…the boats are sawn in half at the end, leaving riders to jump to safety.
Robot Parade – Don’t miss the 12 noon parade, featuring animatronic versions of Itchy and Scratchy, as well anthropomorphic bombs and weapons. The robot cast are programmed only to attack each other, spraying fake blood onto the viewing public.
The problem:
In true Westworld style, those robots do malfunction – and Itchy and Scratchy are suddenly intent on butchering the guests, rather than each other.
1. Jurassic Park (Jurassic Park, 1993)
The most famous fictional theme park of all – and perhaps the one that we’d most like to see become a reality. On an island near Costa Rica, scientists have resurrected dinosaurs and put them on display in a sprawling zoo.
The attractions:
Mr DNA ride – in an Epcot-style “edutainment” attraction, guests first watch a video explaining how dinosaur DNA was extracted from mosquitoes entombed in amber, before heading off on a dark ride that takes in some of Jurassic Park’s working laboratories.
Safari Tour – guests board on-rails Ford Explorers for a tour around Jurassic Park’s dinosaur enclosures, witnessing triceratops, tyrannosaurus rex and more.
The problem:
The park is unfortunately rather exposed in the face of power cuts, and the dinosaurs are more than happy to devour any guests that they come across.
